I had a crazy experience on my way home from NYC recently. That statement is not unusual. Crazy things always happen at Port Authority but spending a lot of time there, I can say that this experience was next level.
It all started out as an obnoxious, yet normal trip home. I took the subway into Port Authority, get my ticket and go to my terminal.
I am a little early. 5th in line. I am looking down keeping myself busy. Filling in my planner, on my phone, eating dinner I grabbed on the way. I had my headphones in and over my music I can hear some sort of yelling. I mute them and hear a man’s voice, loud and aggressive. I look to my left and notice a man sitting on a bench yelling and flailing his arms around. He seemed to just be yelling out loud to no one in particular. Not unusual. He’s either drunk or mentally ill. The regular scene and Port Authority. I resume my activities.
A few minutes later I hear, “Don’t fucking touch me!” I take out my head phones and look up to see one of the women in front of me pushing the disorderly man. She and her friend are yelling at him to get away from them, to “go sit down back on the bench”, “get out of here”. He continuously tries to touch one of them and put his arm around their shoulders. They are all yelling now. But out of nowhere things calm down and the three of them are laughing and joking around. It seemed the women were trying to deescalate the situation. He is standing a few feet away from them so I think this calmed them but then as quickly as it had died down it started up again. The man puts his arm around one of the women and pushes up against her. They again shove him and curse him out. Everyone is yelling.
The man then starts flipping out. He points to a bunch of people, including myself threatening to kill everyone. “And I’m going to shoot you in the head and I’m going to slit your throat and I’m going to kill you and you…” He’s going on and on threatening everyone’s life. At this point I’m thinking I need to find security because who knows if this man actually has weapons on him. I put my pepper spray in my pocket just in case.
Usually there is security walking all over Port Authority at all times of the day and night….except for this time. I cannot find a single security guard or bus driver! I am walking up and down the floor, looking everywhere.
Finally I see an elderly looking bus driver that honestly looks too old to be driving. I go up to him and whisper, “Umm excuse me?” He responds, “Who? What? When? Where? Why?” Trying to joke around. I am trying to be discrete because I don’t want the man to see me talking to a bus driver. I explain that there is a man threatening everyone’s lives and ask him to call security. This old bus driver points to an old, decrepit pay phone and tells me to call the police from there. I say, “Don’t you have a way to call the Port Authority security?” He tells me no and again, points to the payphone. I was pretty sure he was lying but I go over to the pay phone and dial 911. While it is ringing I see my bus pull up. I hang up the phone thinking I can just talk to my bus driver.
My bus driver gets off the bus and stands at the podium to collect tickets when the man goes and shoves his ticket in the bus driver’s face and tells him to let him on the bus. The bus driver raises his voice and tells the man to “back up”, “Get out of my face.” The man doesn’t listen and keeps shoving his ticket in the bus driver’s face, insisting on getting on the bus that very moment. The bus driver tells him to back up or he will call security. The man doesn’t listen and yells at the bus driver and curses him out. The bus driver calls security (I knew it!). The man then takes out his cell phone and tells the bus driver that he is recording everything and he will get him fired. He puts his phone right in the bus driver’s face but he is too intoxicated to turn on his camera. He fumbles with his phone but can’t figure it out. The camera isn’t on but he continues to put it in the bus driver’s face yelling that he is recording him. The bus driver screams, “Get that phone out of my face before I take it!”
A manager then walks over and tries to calm the man down and the bus driver is yelling, “You aren’t getting on my bus! You will not be on this bus, sir! Step back, back up! You better get your phone out of my face!”
The bus driver then lets us get on the bus while the manager is attempting to calm the man down.
I sit in the third row on the bus. I can see security walk up and talk with the man. A few minutes later the manager gets on the bus and says, “Is anyone with that man? He is saying his niece is on the bus.”
Really? Obviously the man was lying. Okay then. The two women the man was bothering said, “We know him from upstate, we always see him wandering the streets but we aren’t related to him!” The manager says, “He said you’re his niece.” One of the women responds, “Hell no! I’m not his niece. I just know him from walking around the city.” This goes on for a while, much longer than necessary. The manager just can’t seem to believe that an intoxicated/mentally ill man would lie about having a niece on the bus. IT MUST BE TRUE! WHERE IS SHE? At this point I am rolling my eyes so far back that they can see my brain. After what feels like an hour, the manager finally gets off the bus, believing there is no niece.
Through the window, I see security walk away. The bus driver gets on and closes the door. The man is nowhere in sight. I don’t know what happened to him but now I can finally sit back, relax, and rest on my ride home, right? WRONG!
About fifteen minutes into the drive I hear yelling over my iPod again. No, it can’t be…I must be making it up. It’s supposed to be smooth sailing now! I reluctantly take out my earbuds and the same two women from earlier are yelling at the bus driver.
They are yelling at him for texting while driving. He denies it. They continue going back and forth. One of the women yells, “Do your job! You are responsible for all of these lives on this bus and you are texting? Do your job!” He yells back, “I was not on my phone! There are cameras on this bus. If I were on my phone then I would lose my job!” “We saw you! I saw you with my own eyes.” The bus driver then yells, “Well if you are worried about it then put your seat belt on!” This statement sends the women over the edge. “MY SEAT BELT! Did you just tell me to put my seat belt on?” He says, “If you are so worried about your life then you would have it on.” She yells that it doesn’t matter if she has her seat belt on if the bus flips from him texting (valid point). Then it escalates, as if it weren’t already escalated.
The bus driver starts saying that because they are in the first row that it is required they have their seat belts on. One of the women says, “I sit in this seat every time I ride the bus and not one bus driver has told me it’s required. I’ve never sat with the seat belt on in this seat.” He insists it’s required, she insists it’s not. It goes back and forth for a while until the bus driver actually pulls the bus over on the side of the highway! One of the women starts hysterically laughing, “Is this really happening? Are you really doing this right now?” He turns the lights on and stands over the women. He says in a loud, controlling voice that they can either put on their seat belt or move their seats. By this point I am sunken down so low in my seat that I might actually fall through the bottom of the bus.
One of the women complies and puts on her seat belt. The other woman jolts up and starts screaming her head off, “YOU FUCKING DICK HEAD! YOU’RE SUCH A FUCKING DICK YOU ASSHOLE! DO YOUR JOB AND DRIVE THE BUS! JUST DO YOUR JOB! DRIVE THE FUCKING BUS AND GET ME HOME!” She goes on like this for quite some time and she storms off to the back of the bus.
The bus driver sits, pretty satisfied with himself. He says to the woman in the first row with her seat belt on, “Are we all good now?” (or something to that effect) She laughs and says, “Uh huh, great! Can you just get me home now?” He says, “Why yes, of course. I am just concerned for your safety, I want to extend your life and make you have a healthy, long life.” Sarcastically, “Ohh thank you!”
Another woman in another row says, “Can you turn off the lights please?” I’m thinking “Why? Why did you have to say anything? Was it necessary to open your mouth?” The bus driver yells, “This is my bus and I will turn off the lights when I want to turn off the lights!” The woman from the front row with her seat belt on laughs. A few seconds later he turns off the lights.
The end.